"Real Friends Do Not Keep Secrets From Each Other"

"For there is nothing hidden which will not be revealed, NOR HAS ANYTHING BEEN KEPT SECRET BUT THAT IT SHOULD COME TO LIGHT". Jesus, Mark 4:22 NKJV (Capitals are mine for emphasis)

SECRETS HAVE A WAY OF EXPOSING THEMSELVES

The quickest way to permanently destroy a friendship is to keep secrets from each other. Secrets have a way of exposing themselves. Someone unintentionally makes "a slip of the tongue". Another person who is not aware that it is a subject which is supposed to be "kept under wraps" starts talking about it to the one who was intended to "stay in the dark". Once it "comes to light", there are questions as to why it was a secret in the first place.

SUCH BEHAVIOR, ALTHOUGH IT MAY BE WELL INTENTIONED, WILL ALWAYS EVENTUALLY BACKFIRE

The sad consequences are that confidence in the other individual has been eroded, and trust has been seriously compromised. Afterward, because of this unpleasant experience everything is suspect, and suspicions about other matters will be constantly aroused. Such behavior, although it may be well intentioned, will always eventually backfire. The whole issue says to the other friend, "I do not think you are mature enough for me to share this information with you. Therefore, our friendship now has 'conditions put on it', and I feel demeaned and belittled. From now on, if our friendship is not only to survive, but to thrive, I am an adult, so talk to me, so I do not think you are holding out on me". Forget the excuse, "Well, I didn't want you to worry". It is time to be open with each other.

IT IS INFORMATION THAT IS NOT TO BE REVEALED TO ANY OTHER PERSON, NOT EVEN THE PASTOR'S WIFE

Now, I am not talking about confidences others share with us, with the understanding that they are not to be told to anyone else, period. There are things men tell their pastor with the proviso, "this is just between us". It is information that is not to be revealed to any other person, not even the pastor's wife. Likewise, when women tell her something in confidence, she is not to share it with her husband. What I am talking about are issues between good friends. As Jesus said, "Let your yes be yes, and your no be no". Let's be real with our real friends. We both deserve to have a friendship which is based on honesty. We should not say something behind their backs which we would not be able to say to them face-to-face.

WE HAVE A SACRED DUTY AND OBLIGATION TO TAKE THE FEELINGS OF OTHERS INTO CONSIDERATION

Isn't it better hearing the truth "from the horse's mouth", then receiving the news accidentally from a third party? We are no longer children, but adults. And, as born again Christians this should be part of our mind-set. One way or the other, eventually these secrets will come out. We have a sacred duty and obligation to take the feelings of others into consideration. When "the air has been cleared", let us feel free to "tell the truth in love". This policy will promote security and confidence in our interpersonal relationships.

Bishop Marvin Schmidt

World Changers International

"Making a Difference in Our World"

Bishop_Marvin@WCI888.com

"Your First Source of Inspiration and Information"